MEMORANDUM
To: Raphael (Arch 6412)
Dept: Customer Services
From: The Chairman, The Boardroom
cc: Hel plc & Paradise plc
Date: 46 BT.AD
SUBJECT: One Speck of Sand
Your new here at Ivory Tower Castlesands. As a Customer Relations Manager (CRM) I'm refering this matter to you. Have it dealt with.
Just so you know in future its for the Complaints
Department, its a division we do not
have here at this parent company but part of our subsidary called Hel plc as they have the
necessary shovels and other equipment to handle such matters as these.
As everyone of our clients know's the quality of our sand is highly impeccable and Hel plc deals in the 'sand dunes' to be recycled elsewhere.
This client seems to be complaining about one speck of sand in a batch supplied. I have enough things to do with my time other than these implied suggestions that something could be amiss with our sand.
Raphael
reply back to them that we'll look into the matter and examine this one speck of sand
thoroughly as the standard reply to them.
As they found this one speck of sand we'll charge them triple for the handling costs and freight fees at the premium rates for our research services to investigate the matter.
NOTE: I do not want ever to see the likes of this report of complaint on my desk again unless its a client referral, a re-order or about our excellent product ranges which praises our company explicitly.
Raphael log the document in the usual manner along with
requests for salary reviews and promotions etc., with Hel plc immediately.
Company Motto:
Who? Who watches the
watcher's
watching the watcher's watch?
That's Who! Oh and how
from the ivory watchtower
upon yonder heights
am 1 who is ever
so watchful, I am....